Circus tume

At some point in the near future, I will find my son in a contorted position, his leg stuck behind his head. And I will find my daughter dangling from a chandelier, trying to figure out how to get down.
And I will blame Ringling.
I took my kids to the circus twice this weekend, which is two times more than I normally go to the circus in a weekend.
Parker’s favorite was the contortionists, a father-son team who made me very uncomfortable. I don’t know much about the human body, but I know how it is NOT supposed to bend. During the act, my wife nudged me. I looked over and saw my son trying to pull his foot up over his head, a la the plastic men on the arena floor. He got his foot up to his forehead, and then became a little frustrated when he couldn’t get it all the way over his head. For those of you familiar with 4-year-olds, think about how they channel frustration. Take, for example, when two puzzle pieces will not fit together. Rather than consider the possibility that they were not the right pieces, kids will opt for brute force. Parker will often offer a growl for maximum effect. He took the same approach here, pushing harder and growling loudly, the only result being a sandal imprint on his forehead.
Allie, meanwhile, was fascinated by the woman who grabbed hold of a big silver circle and was pulled up high above the floor where she spun, twisted, flipped and flopped. It was quite graceful and even more unsettling. The most disturbing part for me was when she hung by her heels. You know what the heel’s purpose is? I can assure that its purpose is NOT to dangle upside down from. As she sat there and spun in the air, I looked over at Allie, saw the big grin on her face and thought, “Uh-oh.”
A few other random thoughts from our double circus duty:
1. I heard several complaints about traffic going into the Convocation Center. I had the same reaction as when I hear complaints about traffic around town, and that is to shudder about Atlanta. Every time I go there, I long for the traffic of Aiken. And a few-minute wait into the Convocation Center? When I go to Falcons games with my father-in-law, the wait is brutal, and the folks who constructed the Georgia Dome not only opted for one of the more frightening areas of Atlanta, but you also have to traverse several mountains and valleys to get into the stadium. Basically, the wait into the circus was not that bad, and you didn’t need a Sherpa to get you in.
2. Be careful what you use as a reasoning chip. As everyone now knows, the elephant did not fit in the Convocation Center. They opted to set the elephant outside for folks to see after the circus. After the first night, we started to head out, and my wife opened the can of worms by saying, “Who wants to see the elephant?” Apparently, my vote of “Not me” did not matter. As we were moving with the masses to the elephant, I had this conversation with the kids:
ME: Let’s not battle the crowds to see the elephant.
KIDS: BUT WE WAAAAAAANT TO!!!!
ME: Kids, we have a season pass to the zoo. We can see elephants — and a whole lot more — whenever we want.
KIDS: WE’RE GOING TO THE ZOO!!!!
3. Be careful what you agree to without all of the details. The kids wanted a snow cone. Sure, I said. Everyone should have a snow cone! Let’s just put it this way: The cups the snow cones come in better be in use WELL into their college years. And the clown hat Parker got? Don’t even think of taking it off, bub.
4. Cut clowns some slack. It has become too easy to offer up the “creepy” clown aspect. Truth of the matter is, a serial killer and a crazed Stephen King psycho have given the hardworking lovable clowns a bad rap.
5. Trapeze should be an Olympic sport. Or even remove the net and put it in the X-Games. But either way, the stuff they do is way more entertaining than most Olympic offerings, in particular USA basketball.
All in all, I consider the circus a big success. It passed the one and only test I require for family events — did the kids have a good time? The answer was a resounding yes. We will certainly be back the next time the circus is in town. Assuming we get Parker unstuck and Allie off the ceiling.